Friday Five Big To Do

Kathyrnz posted this excellent FF:
"Greetings from the land of the Big To-Do!

It seems like every year I enter into the summer with a growing list of HUGE projects/events/trips that seem to have a permanent place on the 'to do' list.
This year I have a huge move pending so that takes up an entire list all on its own, but it doesn't take a big event like that for me to make plans bigger than my summer can hold!
How about you?

Is this the third summer in a row you have made a pledge involving your garage and actually getting a car into it?
Did you once again miss the registration deadline for the continuing education event of your dreams ?
Are you starting to think you couldn't even find the tents, let alone get it together to pull off a camping trip?

Here is your chance to get it out into the open and OWN your Big To-Do! Who knows? Maybe making the list will help you move the Big To-Do to the Big Ta-Da!"

1) What home fix-it project is on your Big To-Do?
OMG Buying a new home is the BTD, so big that we have ignored all the fix-it's in our shoe-box that we will keep as a week place. We need SPACE! At least I do. Living in 500 sq ft. with two people may have been ok when I was in my 20's and both of us had a (separate) beach house, but not now. So every weekend we schlep to Long Island and look. 

2) What event (fun or work) is on your Big To-Do?

Registering for the New Fest, the gay and lesbian film festival. I became a member, now I have to choose my tickets before they are all gone! It's at the SVA Theater right around the corner and usually films you just can't see at a movie theater.

 
3) What trip is on your Big To-Do?

Buying tickets for a trip on a barge down some river in France, that is if we can afford it after the big purchase.

 
4) What do you wish was on someone ELSE's (partner, family member, celebrity, etc...) Big To-Do?

For BL, getting with the program on buying the big purchase.

5) Getting inspired? What may end this summer having moved from the Big To-Do to the Big Ta-da?

The big purchase

ACLU responds to the sad loss of Prop 8

Mary Beth posted this Friday Five
"I'm showing my age...this was an anthem of my high school years. Wanna hear it? Give this link a try.

While you're bopping along to that (or perhaps holding your ears...?), let's think about VACATIONS! I certainly am!"

1) What did your family do for vacations when you were a child? Or did you have stay-cations at home?
We usually found a family friendly place within driving distance, though once we went to Niagra Falls, and stayed at a motel with a swimming pool. We usually took my cousin and I got to go on her vacations-we were both only children.

2) Tell us about your favorite vacation ever:
My favorite vacation is usually my most recent and this most recent, a cruise on a Holland America ship chartered by the lesbian company Olivia, was great. 1800 of my closest friends going to the Carribean. Not much sun but lots of fun!

3) What do you do for a one-day or afternoon getaway...is there a place nearby that you escape to on a Saturday afternoon/other day off?
My health club has a lovely pool and deck on the corner of 42nd St and 9th Ave. in NYC. My getaway.

4) What's your best recommendation for a full-on vacation near you...what would you suggest to someone coming to your area? (Near - may be defined any way you wish!)
It's a longish drive, but I like Cape Cod, Provincetown is nice.

5) What's your DREAM VACATION?
I'd like to take a cruise to Europe on the QE2, then take the Grand Tour of Europe. No money spared!

This is quick and dirty as I'm at work, maybe more later...

Ask,Tell

Friend at Work

I've had a friend who I've worked with for about 12-13 years. I've followed her career, as our careers go, first I worked with her from outside of our agency and I used their services for our agency, then I was hired and she was in a more senior position.

  

She's a good friend and I love her. We've seen each other through good times and bad. She came to our wedding and we've met on vacation. We've travelled to professional trips together. 

 

We worked in the same office for many years, but in different units, then we both were promoted to different offices, until this winter when she became the director of our office. This leaves me in the dual position of being the friend and confident of our leader.

Recently we have had several management team meetings that have gone from 10-1:30, straight through lunch. I posted on Facebook that we were having another meeting and I hoped that it would end before lunch. She replied "Stop kvetching." This is NYC-that means complaining. I was unusually hurt by that comment and felt that my work boundaries and personal boundaries had been breached. But we are friends on FB!

I hate lack of boundaries. I like neat, clean beginnings and endings, borders, Good fences make good neighbors and all that.  But life is seldom so neat. And I need to learn to live with a leaky boundary and to do it with grace if possible.

Friday Five A Bugs Life

Sophia posted this FF "As I was walking the beach today, I was surprised and delighted to find it swarming with ladybugs. The sweet little red beetles are one of my favorite insects and also my daughter's blogname--though as of this morning she was thinking of changing it to Butterfly. I'll keep you posted.

This got me thinking about spiritual insect trivia: Did you know that medieval mystics and theologians esteemed the bee for its dedicated work and transformation of ordinary ingredients into sweetness? That Spider Woman is an important creator Goddess to many Native American tribes? Or that Francis of Assisi was reminded of Jesus not only by lambs being led to slaughter, but also by worms (think "I am a worm and no man" from the Psalms)-- so he picked them up and took them out of stomping-vulnerable spots?!
In that spirit, this week's Friday Five is a magical mystery tour through God's garden of creepy crawlies!"

1. Ladybugs or ladybirds? Pillbugs or roly-polys? Jesus bugs or water skeeters? Any other interesting regional or familial name variations?
Lady bugs, Pillbugs, waterskeeters, can't think of any others.

2. Stomp on spiders, carry them outside, or peacefully co-exist?
Arachnoiditis! Stomp on them, crush them, get a tissue and smash the buggers! No Buddist I, in this situation

3. Favorite insect?
Maybe the Lightning Bug-is this regional-Ohio!

4. Least favorite?
Mosquito. They come for me. I'm the parakeet in the mine.

5. Got any good bug stories to share?
Once when I was about 7 I told my mother I had a bug in my ear.I could hear it moving around in there trying to get out. It was midsummer and I had been playing outdoors. My father scoffed. But my mother believed me! She put a lit flashlight to my ear and the bug found it's way out. True story!

The Retreat

The pictures you can find on google, amazing!

I went to the retreat this weekend. Let me clarify, it was a retreat sponsored by Congregation Beth Simchat Torah, the only LGBT synagogue in NYC and the largest in the world and the spiritual home of BL. It's the shul that refused marriage to us because I am not Jewish 6 years ago. (note, they did rent us the shul, but we had to hunt for our own rabbi, a lovely rabbi, Ellen Lippman who has her own synagogue in Brooklyn and a Christian partner.)

For a while, after BL joined, I attended services and became part of the community,and really enjoyed them and except for the Jesus problem, was considering becoming a member. Then the marriage issue came up. I mean, for Christ's sake! This is the only place of it's kind in NYC and embraces, orthodox to reform and plenty of people are coupled with non-Jews (as the head rabbi likes to call us.)

So I went to the retreat with a chip on my shoulder that just kept getting bigger as the weekend went on. I found that we were not in the usual accessible  cabins-that we usually have. This was Bl's fault. She forgot to ask. But they gave the extras of these to parents with children! and refused to switch one when they realized I needed one (I need a seated shower or I fall down.)

As you can see I was carrying around this big chip that had a tendency to grow.

I approached the new president to ask him about ways of making non-Jewish partners more welcome. He said "Well it is a Synagogue!" Ow, that chip was starting to hurt!

This will be my last retreat.

Friday Five May Day

Sally Writes" It is the first of May, or as I have been concentrating on dialogue with folk interested in the new spirituality movement this last week, it is Beltane, a time to celebrate the beginning of summer. The BBC web-site tells us that:

Beltane is a Celtic word which means 'fires of Bel' (Bel was a Celtic deity). It is a fire festival that celebrates of the coming of summer and the fertility of the coming year.
Celtic festivals often tied in with the needs of the community. In spring time, at the beginning of the farming calendar, everybody would be hoping for a fruitful year for their families and fields.
Beltane rituals would often include courting: for example, young men and women collecting blossoms in the woods and lighting fires in the evening. These rituals would often lead to matches and marriages, either immediately in the coming summer or autumn.

Another advert for a TV programme that has caught my eye on the UK's Channel 4 this weekend is called Love, Life and leaving; and is a look at the importance of celebrating the seasons of life through ritual and in the public eye, hence marriages, baptisms and funerals.

I believe that we live in a ritually impoverished culture, where we have few reasons for real celebration, and marking the passages of life;"

So

1. Are ritual markings of birth marriage and death important to you?

Yes, absolutely. My xx birthday is coming up-not starting with a 5 or a 7, and I've been telling everyone who will listen in preparation for my imminent croning!

2. Share a favourite liturgy/ practice.

Well, I always did like the benediction because it was short. But I have been going to a women only ritual in a convent that has different rituals  every Sunday that they are held ( designed by the different women.)

3. If you could invent ( or have invented) a ritual what is it for?

I would like to see a ritual for a young woman's first menstruation. (I think theses exist, but are way underused.)

4. What do you think of making connections with neo-pagan / ancient festivals? Have you done this and how?

Not really. I have a friend who is a partial neo-pagan and have attended some of her rituals but they don't really resonate.

5. Celebrating is important, what and where would your ideal celebration be?

At my High School, this day was for the outdoor living rosary, with girls in pastel dresses instead of our dreary uniforms of plaid skirts and navy blazers. I'd like to celebrate Birthdays and marriage, once it's available for all!

PS, I'm on my way to a three day retreat held by BL's synogogue in CT at the Isabella Freedman Retreat Center. The place is really beautiful, the company can somewhat non-welcoming in my experience. Woo Hoo! These are the folks that wouldn't marry us. I better go pack.

Bucket List Friday Five

I've been thinking a lot about this as I have a BIG Birthday coming this July 25th. I won't say which, but it doesn't start with a 5 or 7. It does give a sense of urgency to things as I read the obits in the NY Times and see more and more people in my age group buying the farm, kicking the bucket-you get the point. Additionally, last year I had major surgery and went through the whole process of  signing all the papers that made beloved my unplugger (because even though we're married in Canada-in the eyes of the USA we are only good friends-sigh.) It kind of makes you think of these things.

So, Singing Owl said:

"It's a Bucket List Friday Five, Gals and Pals!
I wrote this Friday Five a while back but was unable to post it. Just saying, so you know I am not ill! :-) Actually I am heading out of town and will not be able to read your posts till sometime early next week, but I'll do so then. Have fun, and don't think too hard about this one. I figured we were due for some fun after Lent and Good Friday and Easter and all that churchy stuff!

Four days of being mostly in bed with a really bad case of flu (do not worry--I will give no detail) has me pondering the fragility of life. LOL! Death, however, has been cheated in my case and I am up and taking nourishment. In that vein of thought, do you have a "Bucket List"? In other words, from the movie of the same name, five things you want to see, do, accomplish, etc. before you kick the bucket?"

1. I would mostly love to have a place with a little extra room to do my projects and breath. We're in the process (almost typed processing-how about that? see the post before last) Make that one with refrigerator that makes ice cubes on the door.

2. I would like to do more traveling while I can still walk around and enjoy myself ( I have a kind of spinal cord injury see posts marked Cauda Equina Syndrome-and though it's not progressive, I use a cane and  aging seems to bring it's own problems like arthritis which is making things a little worse.)

3. Under traveling, how about France, more of Italy, London, and lets get fanciful Bali, Thailand  and there about, Australia. Cruising and in particular with Olivia . I've always wanted to sail from here to Europe. In my younger days I wanted to do a solo sail, not anymore.

4. I wish I could retire and volunteer as an art teacher. That was my first career. One that I never actually did.

5. I'd love to actually find a church that I love and feel a part of.

I may add to this but this is it for now and I have to go to work!

Easter Parade

As Joe.My.God would Say, double click to embiggen. I took the pics. It was a cool but sunny day. Next year I may make a bonnet!