Road Trip- My Aunt's 90th Birthday!

We're going to Girard and Warren, Ohio for my Aunt Julia's 90th  birthday (code name Juliefest90) this Saturday. We're expecting 64 guests so far. See the article to be posted in the local newspapers:

" Julia Yezzo Pollock Weddell, a woman who spent her life bringing joy to those around her, will celebrate her 90th birthday Saturday, August 16, 2008. Always the first person to lend a helping hand or offer a sympathetic ear, her family is delighted to be holding a party in her honor on August 16 in the Youngstown area.
Born in 1918, Julia worked most of her life in the grocery business, beginning at age 2 when she helped put sugar in bags and eggs in boxes (ed. note my first job was putting those eggs-fresh from the chicken, in the boxes) in her family's store. At 15, she learned to drive so that she could deliver groceries in the store's truck. Later, her family closed their store and she went to work in an area supermarket where she made fruit baskets during the holiday season.
She met her first husband at her sister's music lessons, and they enjoyed life together, quickly becoming godparents to many children of their family and friends, and having a daughter of their own. Sadly, her husband died young, but this didn't keep Julia down. She went on to build her own house, re-marry, enjoy lots of time with family and friends (including her granddaughter), and travel to other countries. She currently resides in Columbus, Ohio with her niece where she enjoys each and every day to its fullest. Even at 90, she is still energetic, friendly, and always willing to help others." written by her grandchild and my godchild.

She was always and still is like a second mother to me and I'm lucky I still have her. She insisted on walking me down the aisle at my religious wedding to BL.

Friday Five

Presbyterian Gal posted "It’s August. An oppressively hot and humid month where many of us live.

I remember the Al Pacino movie though not much about the plot. Just that it was very, very hot. And he had giant sweat stains on his shirt. (ed note: It was "Dog Day Afternoon" and he was robbing something to pay for a sex change for his lover)
As I pass through this year’s dog days in my felon ridden neighborhood (OK, just two housefuls. But isn’t that enough?), I am trying to focus on the blessings apparent around me, past and present, that I might not notice, necessarily. In that spirit, this week’s Friday Five goes thusly:"

1. What is your sweetest summer memory from childhood? Did it involve watermelon or hand cranked ice cream? Or perhaps a teen summer romance. Which stands out for you?
My sweetest summer memories (and saddest) involve the outdoor summers growing up in Ohio. We had a big yard that was my grandparents and where my parents build a house and my aunt and uncle had a house . There were several gardens and an Orchard, an outdoor fireplace to cook and big grape arbor, a giant swing my uncle built, a basketball hoop, a voleyball court, and lots of lawn. We were always outside playing, cooking, eating, picking fruit! It was lovely.

2. Describe your all time favorite piece of summer clothing. The one thing you could put on in the summer that would seem to insure a cooler, more excellent day.
Well, I did wear a two piece Jantzen swim suit from the time I was 16 till I lost the top, around the time I was 35 or so. I loved that navy suit with the swimming girl on the leg and the white piping...

3. What summer food fills your mouth with delight and whose flavor stays happily with you long after eaten?
Corn, watermelon, tomatoes, basil, and ice cream-that was easy.

4. Tell us about the summer vacation or holiday that holds your dearest memory.
Probably a trip to Italy I several years ago, although it took place in March!

5. Have you had any experience(s) this summer that has drawn you closer to God or perhaps shown you His wonder in a new way?
I'm still looking for this. As a child I prayed and prayed, obsessively one might say, that my father would stop drinking and my parents would stop fighting, and my prayers went unanswered. Sigh. Every day, in the subway, I pass people with red baseball caps and red aprons who accost me with flyers, saying prayer works. It always takes me back to the prayers of my childhood.

Bonus question: When it is really hot, humid and uncomfortable, what do you do to refresh and renew body and spirit?
A nice cold shower, followed by a nap. Or a swim in my lovely pool on 42nd St.

Up coming Retreat in the NY,PA,OH and all point near area

KIRKRIDGE RETREAT AND STUDY CENTER
2495 Fox Gap Road, Bangor, PA 18013-6028, 610-588-1793 . Fax: 610-588-8510
www. kirkridge.org
KIRKRIDGE
RETREAT AND STUDY CENTER
Sisterly Conversations: For Lesbian, Bisexual, Transwomen and Allies
VIRGINIA MOLLENKOTT
September 5-7, 2008 Fri 6:30 dinner thru Sun lunch
Program $150 + Room/Board $175
Current Issues for Lesbian, Bisexual, and Transwomen of Faith and our Allies. Sisterly
Coversations 2008 will focus on TRANSCENDING DAMAGE FROM CHURCH, FAMILY, AND SOCIETY. Activities include
• a presentation/small groups on what forgive- ness/transcendence mean and do not mean from a biblical perspective
• panel discussions/smallgroups on
--the role of communities in our healing
--developing relationships that help transcend early damage
--spiritual practices that support sexual and bodily healing
• talent-sharing, partying, dancing, singing together.
• screening of For The Bible Tells Me So, an award-winning film about families of faith who support their GLBT members
Music by Penny Gnesen and Sue Fulton, directors of the famed a capella group OLYMPIA’S DAUGHTERS.
Coordination and worship led by The Rev. Lillian Porter.
Virginia Mollenkott is a transgender lesbian Christian who is also a mother, grandmother,and author of 12 books, including the newly revised and expanded Omnigender (2007) and Sensuous Spirituality (forthcoming, 2008). She has been speaking and/or leading workshops at Kirkridge for over 35 years.
For more information check out her web site at
www.virginiarameymollenkott.com

21 years- a lot can happen

Yesterday was my 21st anniversary in a 12 step program. A lot can happen in 21 years. I reviewed it with my therapist who I was seeing 21 years ago and am now seeing again! She helped me to get sober. I lost both of my parents, my mother in the first year, my father in the third. After not working for two years, I went back to work then went back to school to earn my masters degree in counseling. I've had 4 jobs in this field and have been in my present job for almost 10 years. I met my beloved, now wife 17+ years ago. I've been to Italy, Puerto Rico, Canada a number of times, including the Canadian Rockies, all over the US.  I've formed a better relationship with my godchild and my cousins. I'm on my 3rd computer and just got an Iphone.  There's more, but that's all I have time for now, just one more thing. I'm alive.

Friday Five Locked Out

Songbird reported that the Revgals blog was lockdown and reported as spam! yesterday:
“We requested a blog review, and I posted a request at the Blogger Help group, where I found we were not alone. Many other perfectly nourishing and cromulent blogs got the same notice last night.This turned out to be a very small barricade in our blogging community life, but it seemed appropriate to explore locks and blocks and other barriers this week. Also, I liked the picture of the security team above! Could they be Blogger's Spam Prevention Robots, working overtime?”She asked these questions for this weeks FF:
“In honor of their efforts, I bring you the "Lock Me Out, Lock Me In" Friday Five.”

1) How do you amuse yourself when road construction blocks your travel?Well, since I usually travel by subway, I also usually have a book so that takes care of that. It’s rarely construction, but a sick passenger or blocked tracks or something that the garbled announcement tries to tell us, but as usual the passengers are only left guessing at ?-(

2) Have you ever locked yourself out of your house? (And do you keep an extra key somewhere, just in case?)
I once left my apartment with my partner. I had the day off and was going shopping for groceries, she was going to work in NJ. She locked the door and I went to Whole Foods, merrily packing my big shopping cart, only to discover…no keys. And of course, in a NY apartment, no place to hide them. So I went to Kinko’s the local copy place and rent a computer place- no cell phones yet, I rented a computer e-mailed her at work and waited for her to reply, hoping that the vegetables wouldn’t wilt. She actually called Kinko’s and came back home to let me in! I thought I was rather clever to find a computer and e-mail.

3) Have you ever cleared a hurdle? (And if you haven't flown over a material hurdle, feel free to take this one metaphorically.)
Yes, many mental hurdles which I won’t go into right now, but will say I hope to celebrate 21 years of sobriety on 8/5/08!

4) What's your approach to a mental block?
I usually stumble over it.

5) Suggest a caption for the picture above; there will be a prize for the funniest answer!
Macho, Macho Man. I Want to be a Macho Man!

"Joni and Friends" an Evangelical Ministry and Disability Center

I was paging through a magazine that passed through our office. I'd never seen this one before and it had a little article about this women, Joni, who had a diving accident a number of years ago and now had paraplegia and had started her own ministry, "Joni and Friends, International Disability Center. Hmmm. I thought what a strange name for a Church. So I went to the website and it sounded more like a church than a 'disability center' though the outreach seems to be to individuals with disabilities. There was a place for questions so I asked how their church felt about homosexuals. I waited for about 6 weeks. Actually I forgot all about it until tonight when I got a three page letter which I will quote in part:

"God doesn't love the homosexual any less that sic. He love anyone else. His love, compassion and forgiveness is toward all. Such behavior, however, is a departure from God's expressed order. No matter how we may rationalize the relationships, the reference in Romans chapter I makes it clearly the product of a reprobate mind. But dont's think I'm attaching the phrase "reprobate mind" just to homosexuals-the immoral heterosexuals or prejudiced , bigoted heterosexuals-are called upon to repent of sin and no longer practice the ungodly patterns of living they have enjoyed before.
The church needs to take a hard look at her attitudes and treatment of gays and lesbians in the past. The church cannot condone homosexual life style; however, the church should begin to bring victory to those who are willing to submit their sexual orientation to Him needs to be shared... and shared in a sensitive and caring manner."

Reprobate
 Pronunciation:
\ˈre-prə-ˌbāt\
Function:
transitive verb
Inflected Form(s):
rep·ro·bat·ed; rep·ro·bat·ing
Etymology:
Middle English, from Late Latin reprobatus, past participle of reprobare — more at reprove
Date:
15th century
1 : to condemn strongly as unworthy, unacceptable, or evil
2 : to foreordain to damnation
3 : to refuse to accept : reject
synonyms see criticize
— rep·ro·ba·tive \ˈre-prə-ˌbā-tiv\ adjective
— rep·ro·ba·to·ry \-bə-ˌtȯr-ē\ adjective

They then proceeded to refer me to Exodus international. I thought that a ministry that reached out to individuals with disabilities would be interesting, particularly one started with a woman with a severe disability. I think I'll skip that.

Friday Five: What You Absolutely, Positively, Can't Leave Home Without

Singing Owl posted this weeks Friday Five and since we're about to leave for the New Jersey Shore it's perfect-I'm not packed!

"We will be at a chaplain's convention when you all are answering the Friday Five Questions. I'll look forward to reading your answers next week when I get home. At the moment we are trying to get the car loaded so we can hit the road, so this will be a simple F.F. This running around madly in order to leave has me wondering: what are the five things you simply must have when you are away from home? And why? Any history or goofy things, or stories?"

1. Well, I'm reluctant to leave home without my computer, although it's awfully heavy, and now that I have my IPHONE! I can check my e-mail and send e-mail -at least theoretically- Apple is still working things out) and surf the web without it!
2. If there's a pool nearby, a suit, bathing-that is.
3. If we're staying in a hotel, something decent that I can slip into in the dark to go to the lobby. BL sleeps much later than I do. I have to have coffee and read.
4. Various meds. I have Cauda Equina Syndrome- a kind of Spinal Cord Injury- a hidden disability, which requires some pain control. Here's the story- When we went to Italy, what do you think I forgot, my Topamax-not a controlled substance. Our Bella guide, listened to my panic and took us to a local Farmacia. It turns out her brother was a doctor and well known in the small town. She was able to talk the pharmacist into give me a supply-very expensive!
5. Books. Must have the books!
6. Of course toiletries, clothes, shoes, all the rest...

Tagged by Exiles return

My office is being recarpeted and refurnished and I'm in a borrowed office, so I'm blogging from work. Exile's Return sent me this meme.
1. List these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog.

1 Tomorrow is really my birthday! July 25th.
2.I played the flute in the Ursuline High School Band
3 My first job was when I was 13 y/o as a page in the Girard,OH Free Library. (earned .45 cents per hour.)
4. I'm on my 4rd career. Dropping a few transions.
5. I was once a professional pupeteer. I played Dino the dinosaur as a live puppet and almost got pulled into the audienceby my tail ( by a child.)
6. I worked in professional theater as a scenic designer while I was in college and moved to New York to study scenic painting.
7. I read about a lot of books a year and and stopped posting reviews on Goodreads when I couldn't keep up.

I'm not passing it on, except to maybe Barb. You know who your are...

Friday Five -What's in a Name?

The RevHRod posted this The Friday Five: What's in a name?

"If you are a regular reader of Songbird's blog, you know that "The Princess" has requested a new name. Her older brother changed his "secret identity" a while back and now this lovely young lady is searching for a new name on her mother's blog. This got me to thinking. How do we come up with all of these names? There must be at least a few good stories out there.

In honor of the Princess I have posted a picture of one of my favorite members of fictional royalty, Robert Munch's "Paperback Princess." She is a brave young woman who doesn't need anyone else to fight her battles. And she knows that what is most important isn't tiaras and finery but what's on the inside. If you haven't read this little fairy tale, I highly recommend it. But I digress."

1. So how did you come up with your blogging name? And/or the name of your blog?
I'm a member of a twelve step group and 21 (as of August 5th through the grace of God)years ago, I started learning a group of slogans designed to keep me sober. One was progress not perfection. As I started studying counseling, I learned about process and the necessity of it for lots of things in our lives, So I changed that slogan to 'Process, not perfection.' That's my story.

2. Are there any code names or secret identities in your blog? Only one BL which stands for my Beloved, now my...wife! And I am hers. ( I am my beloveds and my beloved is mine.)

3. What are some blog titles that you just love? For their cleverness, drama, or sheer, crazy fun? I like Velveteen Rabbi, Lutheran Chik's L Work Diary-which I also enjoy reading of course!

4. What three blogs are you devoted to? Other than the RevGalBlogPals of course!

Of course I love RevGalBlogPals-and love to say it! But additionally I like: Seeking Authentic Voice, Views from the Road-for the descriptiveness. (more to be added.)

5. Who introduced you to the world of blogging and why?

I discovered it myself by surfing the net and wanted to do it.

Bonus question: Have you ever met any of your blogging friends? Where are some of the places you've met these fun folks? I had a near miss with Barb from Views from the Road who was here in NYC for Easter weekend, but was so booked up, that we never did meet. Maybe her next trip. I've been e-mailing with Mary from Little Mary to book her to speak at my group, so a meeting is in the works!

And, by the way. NY is a popular destination, you RevGals. So, e-mail me!

Hershey Park-that I missed as a child and missed again

BL has a niece and nephew. Since the children have been born, she has done her best to be a good aunt, making frequent visits, planning vacations, and picking out thoughtful gifts. She loves than as if they were hers.

This weekend was supposed to be a special weekend. BL's niece (NE) never requested a special trip before, unlike her brother A who always had a destination and route etc., so we were really happy when she perked up when we mentioned Hershey Park and said "Can we really?" Wow! Pay dirt! "Can we stay in the park?" Sure, why not!

So we planned. The night before, the mother we called the mother to make plans. She said, "NE is growing up so in the future, could you please "not do anything" 'or get a suite.' Do anything??? When we are with then we are the perfect aunties and neither of us has a pe*is, by the way. We have never done anything inappropriate in the sight of the children's eyes-or any ones. Homophobia runs deep in this family.

 
I left work early on Friday to pack-time I have little of because of my recent brush with surgery and hospitals which has still left me exausted much of the time. Neither of us could sleep on Friday night, so we got kind of a slow start on Saturday-actually I was up, but Sue can catch up and slept late.

Gaily we set up toward Pennsylvania. I love the state having grown up in Ohio. We finally arrived to find the niece and father, who had visited the zoo. The ne chastised us for arriving late and stopping for lunch-a slice of pizza and a pee stop! Uh-what's going on here? BL, brother and ne visited chocolate world, but I finally had to take a nap. We finally had dinner at a HP restaurant-overpriced and not so good. Then fireworks.

The next day I was up at my usual 6:00-late for me. I hung around the lobby for an hour. then went swimming-nice pools.(didn't want to wake the sleeping beauties)  I finally got a call around 10:00am. They were up. I went to the room to fine BL and ne deep in conversation about sensitive topics related to the family. Finally that ended. It was Brunch time, we brunched. Finally park time."I really don't feel like going to the park, my stomach hurts and the rides might upset it."NO PARK!  So BL and ne went to the butterfly garden. I took another nap-it was 3:00 by this time and I was tired and had a headache. I won't go into the talk in this venue. Later we sat around the room. playing cards until the ac broke, then it was replaced-the Hershey folks were quite gracious and I ate way too much chocolate.

The next day was worse.

Shortly after we got back on the road, BL had to pull over because she was crying too hard. She cryed on and off for the rest of the evening worried about what she had done wrong. Since the children have been born, she has done her best to be a good aunt. Now she feels she is losing then due to the imminent divorce of the parents.