Friday Five on Saturday Morning

Picture from a Pond on Cape Cod this summer 07, August. Wish I was there.

Finally, beloved, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. (Philippians 4:8, NRSV)

Friends, it's nearly Thanksgiving in the U.S. and it's the time of year when we are pressed to name things for which we are thankful. I want to offer a twist on the usual lists and use Paul's letter to the church at Philippi as a model. Name five things that are:

1.True, That each day arrives and that we put one foot in front of the other
2.Honorable, That most of us try to do the best we can in our work and in our lives-I do.
3. Just, That people believe in causes and are free to pursue their beliefs, soldiers in Iraq and protesters in the US
4.Pure, My nap at 4:30, getting home exausted, collapsing onto the bed.
5.Pleasing, A brand new book by a favorite author, just waiting to be read. And when I can eat it, LiLac Chocolates.
6.Commendable, excellent or worthy of praise. Those of us that have the time and energy to go above and beyond.

the recovering counselor speaks

This is my gall bladder that fell out and walked away

Well, what surgery... ?

Actually it's a Bananna slug I took a picture of. I just wish my gall bladder would walk away.

I had the ERCP, and all I got was this pancreatitis! For which I've been in the hospital and in pain and a promise of another ERCP as the MRCP didn't see all of the massive stones that I actually have and they couldn't remove them all. I am home now. I have two options, one to have another ERCP-risking another bout of pancreatitis then the laprascopic surgery. Or open surgery, and no gall bladder. Guess which way I'm leaning.

The First Big Day- ERCP

When the gastroentrologist plays "go fish" with 3 gall stones that have gone astray outside of my gallbladder and are doing bad things like blocking bile ducts. They do this by inserting an endoscope, then inserting tools to locate and grab those straying stones, then retrieving them...through my mouth. Thank GOD I will be asleep. The last time I had an endoscopy, I was awake, with meds. that give you retrograde amnesia. This means that the process is really unpleasant, but you DON'T REMEMBER IT! Except I remember all of it. It was for an bleeding ulcer I got as a result of taking NSAID'S for a really bad back for which I was having emergency surgery. They discovered the ulcer when I went in for emergency surgery and my blood count was so low, I had to have 4 units of blood before surgery. But I digress. I'm starting to freak out about all of these procedures/surgerys. I was in the office yesterday and was overwhelmed with work. The plan was to go in this morning at 7:30-my usual start time-then leave at 11;00. It's about an hour travel time. It seems like so much and I'm in some pain. This gallbladder stuff makes my back hurt more than it usually does. Do I have to go into the office for 3 hours-and two hours commute? Tell me no.

On another note, give a shout out to my friend Natty who is having a rough time in the discerning process for her vocation. Her blog is: http://opme.blogspot.com/

I Hate to Keep Joking About This

I'm having an ERCP this Thursday-where the gastroentrologist plays go fish with my stray gall stones, then I'm FINALLY having surgery on Monday! At last, after Sonogram, MRCP, ERCP, DX of HEP A, numerous blood tests and now 3 doctors-1 who is on my plan and two who are mucho dinero! So let me amuse you with-

Things you don't want to hear during surgery:

Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness."

Bo! Bo! Come back with that. Bad dog!

Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?

Hand me that... uh... that uh... that thingy there.

Oh no! Where's my Rolex.

Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived from 500 ml of this stuff before?

There go the lights again?

"Ya know, there's big money in kidneys? and this guy's got two of 'em."

Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!

Could you stop that thing from beating; it's throwing off my concentration.

What's this doing here?

I hate it when they're missing stuff in here.

That's cool. Now can you make his leg twitch by pressing that one?!

Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.

Sterile schmerile. The floor's clean, right?

OK, now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.

This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?

Nurse, did this patient sign an organ donation card?

Don't worry. I think it is sharp enough.

What do you mean "You want a divorce?!?"

FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out!

Oh no! Page 47 of the manual is missing!

NY Marathon in honor of my friend Laurie -who runs and runs and runs-go girl!

Friday Five-Interviews

"Songbird just had an interview for a "vague and interesting" possibility, and More Cows than People is doing campus visits for doctoral programs. There always seem to be a few RevGals applying for new positions, and I just got my first call for this year's preliminary interviews for college teaching jobs at the American Academy of Religion meeting in San Diego coming up in a few weeks. It's for my dream job among this year's offerings, and I am flipflopping between excitement and nervousness. So please keep your fingers crossed and say a little prayer for everyone facing such conversations, and share your thoughts on the wonderful world of interviews:"

This is a topic near and dear to my heart because I've been on a lot of interviews, I've done a lot of interviews and I'm a Senior Vocational Rehabilitation Counselor in my current gig, so some of my staff teach people how to interview. dress for interviews, answer those tricky questions like "have you ever been arrested. (actually that's illegal.)

1. What was the most memorable interview you ever had? Probably the interview for my current job. It was a promotion.
I was hating my job and this had come up at just the right time. It was supervising a unit of counselors like the unit I was in, in a different office. My supervisor at the time was an unkind person. The interview committee-yes you heard that right was 7 people as I recall. They had a written list of questions and when they asked about something, I talked about how I acquired my disability and started crying-not sobbing, just verklempt. I got the job anyhow. I really wanted that job! And I really like it!

2. Have you ever been the interviewer rather than the interviewee? If so, are you a tiger, a creampuff, or somewhere in between?
Often, in different settings. And I'm usually either a creampuff or somewhere in between. I worked for NOW NYC as Development Director before grad. school. One of my jobs was to supervise the phone bank. Phone banks, I've noticed, attract an edgy group of people. This one was no different. I should have been tougher and asked more questions, but hindsight is 20/20.I hired a guy who later turned out to be Hedda Lettuce the local drag queen. I had to fire him and his parting shot was to call me a fat bitch. I thought I was kind of svelt at the time!

3. Do phone interviews make you more or less nervous than in-person ones?
Never had one.

4. What was the best advice you ever got to prepare for an interview? How about the worst?
My advice to you. Be on time! Be yourself. Be prepared and well rested. Make sure there are no typos on you c.v. or resume. Ask the interviewers what about this company (or whatever) would make you want to work there. (I used this at my current job and it worked well) Know a good joke but don't tell it unless asked (and I have been asked, really.)

5. Do you have any pre-interview rituals that give you confidence?
No

Good luck!

Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster

Surgery to remove my gall bladder has been delayed by a four initial procedure to remove 3 renegade gall stones that have escaped and are wreaking havoc.

So when I was at the hospital, I picked up a brochure that described this program. Hmmm. I already had this cd, passed along by a colleague at work. I started listening to it. It seems that a large feature is prayer, who knew? It's supposed to speed healing and decrease the use of pain medication. I've been listening on the subway on the way to work. I am stressed, primarily because of the delays for this 'simple' surgery. I received a promotion last January and I'm still on probation and that Catholic schoolgirl who still lives in me believes that being absent so much will effect my supervisors judgement of me. And each exam brings the need for a new exam or a procedure before surgery. Sigh.

About Prepare for Surgery-Mind Body Technique by Peggy Huddelston

"Using five steps to prepare for surgery, you'll feel profoundly peaceful in the days before your operation. In turn this peace will create the biochemistry of healing and speed your recovery.
Peggy Huddleston is the author of Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster. She is a psychotherapist, conducting research on the benefits of her pre-surgical program at a Harvard Medical School teaching hospital in Boston.

Her clinical work and research focus on the ways positive emotions and the human spirit enhance healing.

She has taught workshops in self-healing to thousands of people in Boston, New York, Philadelphia, Paris and Amsterdam. Her book and tape were recently featured on PBS-TV's Body and Soul.

Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster Workshops are offered in hospitals and HMOs by nurses and therapists trained and certified by Peggy Huddleston."

How Will I Die

How will I die? Your Result: You will die while having sex.   Your last moments in this life will be enjoyable indeed...hopefully. Do not fear sex. Try not to become celibate as a way of escaping death. You cannot run from destiny.
You will die while saving someone's life.
You will die from a terminal illness.
You will die in a car accident.
You will die in your sleep.
You will die of boredom.
You will die in a nuclear holocaust.
You will be murdered.
How will I die? Create a Quiz

Well, that's a relief!

Getting my Gizzard Popped

On my journey to gall bladder surgery I had an ultrasound and last Friday had an MRCP or Magnetic Resonance Cholangiopancreatography. The instructions were to fast-nothing by mouth-for four hours before the 8:30 AM test, so I got up at 3:30 to take my am medication and to worry for a bit. You see, this has been dragging on since September which may not seem like much, but I started a new job-well not a NEW job, but a promotion-last January and taking all this time off is giving me angst. And now having to have surgery and all of the pre-testing time is stressing me.

So I arrived at 7:45, always early as the nuns taught me, starving, and craving coffee, to discover that it was not necessary to fast. As a matter of fact, the first thing I was made to do was drink pineapple juice. If only it had caffeine or valium in it!

The next thing, of course was to disrobe and then robe in a color coded hospital gown-or two as I never know the code for woman size. I discovered that an MRCP is pretty much like any other scan. It’s like being in your own toilet paper tube which is then tossed into a cement mixer. Only this scan had headphones with nice music when the cement mixer was off. And I wasn’t doing breathing exercises, breathe in, breathe out, breathe in and hold it…

I’ll have the results in a day or two or my surgeon will. I have a pre-surgery examination on Wednesday (1/2 day off.) I have a second opinion on Thursday (1/2 day off.) By the time I actually have the surgery I’ll have no time left.

One thing I did discover was a brochure that offered a free program at the hospital to ”Feel calmer before surgery. Use less pain medication. Recover faster.” I think I should call right now.

Music by the Dallas Metropolitan MCC