Friday Five, Lent

1. Did you celebrate Mardi Gras and/or Ash Wednesday this week? How?
Actually, I was so busy celebrating the return to work, after 2 months on sick leave, I neglected all other celebrations. Pretty tired... but really happy to be working and not watching TV!

2. What was your most memorable Mardi Gras/Ash Wednesday/Lent?
The advent of Lent was always memorable when I was in parochial school. Always discussion of who was giving up what. Then seeing how long that lasted.

3. Did you/your church/your family celebrate Lent as a child? If not, when and how did you discover it?
Yes, we did and this was before Vatican II, so I remember lots of rules re:meals for the adults. I vaguely remember that only one meal a day could be a meat meal-correct me if I'm wrong about this-and that the size of breakfast and lunch had to be smaller-together-than dinner.

OK, I looked this up-

Factoid: Pre-Vatican III During Lent Complete abstinence on Fridays, Ash Wednesday, and Holy Saturday morning. Complete abstinence means no meat or soup or gravy made from meat.

Fast on the weekdays of Lent. Fast means one full meal and two meatless meals, sufficient to maintain strength. The two additional meals may not equal another full meal. Meat may be taken at the principal meal on a day of fast (provided the day is not Ash Wednesday, a Friday, or Holy Saturday morning).

No eating between meals, but liquids, including milk and juice are allowed.

Beer and wine are allowed, but no hard alcohol. (snide comment, you'd have to know that those Catholics would allow alcoholic!)

Note that these were the rules back in the 1950s. This was particularly difficult for everyone, but I remember my mother who was a butcher in a her own store (a rare occupation for a woman in those days) and did hard physical labor and really abided by these rules (I had one can of tuna and a melba toast...), struggling to eat enough to have enough strength. These rules also took effect when you turned 14. Thank God I turned 14 after Vatican II and only had to struggle with whether to give up chocolate or spinach! (which I am allergic to and, of course can't eat anyway.)

4. Are you more in the give-up camp, or the take-on camp, or somewhere in between?
The only thing I do now is give up working on Good Friday.

5. How do you plan to keep Lent this year?
As shown in number 4.

Friday Five, Punxatawney Phil

Title from "Auntie Mame"

First Superbowl ( someone explain to this Brit the significance)- love it or hate it?
I've never understood football and that's after 4 years of attending and participating in football games as a member of the marching band at Ursuline High School in Youngstown, Ohio. I can still keep a line of people straight, however...


5 reasons please!!!!!
Second Candlemas/ Imbloc/ Groundhog day/ St Brigid's day- all of these fall on either the 1st or 2nd February.

1. Do you celebrate one or more of these?

 
I absolutely watch the weatherman for signs of the groundhog to see if he sees his shadow. I have done this since childhood and I believe that it is a sign of the end of winter.

2. How?

See above

3. Is this a bit of fun or deeply significant?

Of course, deeply significant.

4. Are festivals/ Saints days important to you?

They were in Catholic grade school, but not since. My saint is St. John-can't remember which one, as I was named for my grandfather.

5.Name your favourite Saints day/ celebration.

It would have to be the mysterious St. John, or the St. of Groundhogs
.
Bonus- 2nd Feburary is also my Birthday- I will donate £1.00 for every comment on my Friday Five Post to the Methodist Relief and Development Fund.

http://sallysjourney.typepad.com/sallys_journey/2008/02/options-options.html

PS What is Imbloc?

Pronounced: EE-Molc
Incense: Rosemary, Frankincense, Myrrh, Cinnamon
Decorations: Corn Dolly, Besom, Spring Flowers
Colours: White, Orange, Red

This holiday is also known as Candlemas, or Brigid's (pronounced BREED) Day. One of the 4 Celtic "Fire Festivals. Commemorates the changing of the Goddess from the Crone to the Maiden. Celebrates the first signs of Spring. Also called "Imbolc" (the old Celtic name). This is the seasonal change where the first signs of spring and the return of the sun are noted, i.e. the first sprouting of leaves, the sprouting of the Crocus flowers etc. In other words, it is the festival commemorating the successful passing of winter and the beginning of the agricultural year. This Festival also marks the transition point of the threefold Goddess energies from those of Crone to Maiden.

It is the day that we celebrate the passing of Winter and make way for Spring. It is the day we honour the rebirth of the Sun and we may visualize the baby sun nursing from the Goddess's breast. It is also a day of celebrating the Celtic Goddess Brigid. Brigid is the Goddess of Poetry, Healing, Smithcraft, and Midwifery. If you can make it with your hands, Brigid rules it. She is a triple Goddess, so we honour her in all her aspects. This is a time for communing with her, and tending the lighting of her sacred flame. At this time of year, Wiccans will light multiple candles, white for Brigid, for the god usually yellow or red, to remind us of the passing of winter and the entrance into spring, the time of the Sun. This is a good time for initiations, be they into covens or self-initiations.

Imbolc (February 2) marks the recovery of the Goddess after giving birth to the God. The lengthening periods of light awaken Her. The God is a young, lusty boy, but His power is felt in the longer days. The warmth fertilizes the Earth (the Goddess), and causes seeds to germinate and sprout. And so the earliest beginnings of Spring occur.

This is a Sabbat of purification after the shut-in life of Winter, through the renewing power of the Sun. It is also a festival of light and of fertility, once marked in Europe with huge blazes, torches and fire in every form. Fire here represents our own illumination and inspiration as much as light and warmth. Imbolc is also known as Feast of Torches, Oimelc, Lupercalia, Feast of Pan, Snowdrop Festival, Feast of the Waxing Light, Brighid's Day, and probably by many other names. Some female Witches follow the old Scandinavian custom of wearing crowns of lit candles, but many more carry tapers during their invocations.

Back to Work on Monday

I've been out since 12/2/07. I feel a little anticipatory anxiety, but I spoke to my DOM (state speak for District Office Manager) and ADOM (Assistant-and direct supervisor) and they seem giddy with relief. I guess I should take this as a good sign.

Saturday is my 9th anniversary with NY State, a good thing as I'm totally out of all sick time, vacation time and various times and on one's anniversary, one gets 5 personal days-yay. So I'm not broke, time wise.

I just had my T-Tube pulled out yesterday. I was my last piece of hardware and when it was removed, I flew around the room, backward-not really. Actually, there was not paid. Apparently, the small incision will take a few weeks to heal, so if anyone at work is mean to me, I can just flash it!

So, wish me luck

Congregation Beth Simchat Torah Shabbat Shirah 2008 with Debbie Friedman

It was a great event and this was the first time I heard Ellen Friedman sing live. The Beloved and I were in the first row. This video doesn't show the actual event. The event included the CBST chorus and staff and Joyce Rosenzweig (most excellent music director.)

Friday Five; Winter

Brrrr! Baby, it’s COLD outside! At least that is the case where I am this morning. We are in a January deep freeze. Have a cup of hot tea and tackle five easy seasonal questions.


1. What is the thermometer reading at your house this morning?
Well, on NBC News, it was 22o, no thermometer out my 11th floor window, Maybe I should get one

2. Snow—love it or hate it?
I love the first hour of it,, but walking in NYC in the grey slush, for days, down the subway stairs, having cars splash you, and falling down. Give me SPRING!

3. What is winter like where you are?
See above, Not so much as where I grew up in North Eastern Ohio where we got lots of lake effect snow. And snow days from school!

4. Do you like winter sports? Any good stories?
Not really. I don't like being cold, or having a runny nose, When I was a kid, I played in the driveway with my cousin who was kind of heavy. The driveway was cut out of a hillock of land and the snow drifted in there and it was fun to play in, until my chubby cuz jumped in and couldn't get out. I ran for help.

5. What is your favorite season, and why?
I love spring, although I have lots of allergies. Thanks to the higher power for Zyrtec! There's such promise in the air,the days are getting longer, the buds are getting fat on the trees and then bursting through! Then, finally, peonies are available at the Korean markets. I love Peonies.

Bonus: Share a favorite winter pick-me-up. A recipe, an activity, or whatever.
Get out. Don't be a couch potato (like I'm tempted to do) Go out during the days to get that good vitamin D. Go to a museum!

Why We Take the Health Care Proxy

Every Time Either One of Us goes to the hospital...
(the Beloved and I will celebrate 17 years in March, but still can't get married without leaving the country.)

For My Wife
by Charlene Strong
from the Advocate

When a flash flood took her partner, the renowned audiobook narrator Kate Fleming, one woman learned firsthand the inequities faced by gay and lesbian couples. Now Charlene Strong is making a documentary to call for equality--and commemorate the woman who was her wife in every way but legally.
By Charlene Strong
A little over a year ago, my vivacious partner of 10 years, Kate Fleming, and I sat cozily in front of the television watching Tony Soprano get shot and wind up in a coma. When the episode faded to black, we got up to take a walk around our Seattle neighborhood. As we took in the crisp autumn air, Kate wondered what would happen if one of us wound up just like Tony: unable to make our own decisions in a medical emergency. Since we could not legally marry, would either of us be allowed to take care of the other? We talked over getting medical directives, living wills, and power of attorney documents, but I continued to assume that the dramatic events that would necessitate their use occurred only in the world of TV and movies -- not in our placid everyday lives.

On December 14, 2006, my assumption was tragically shattered. That Thursday, an exceptionally strong storm deluged Seattle with rain. Kate was working as an acclaimed audiobook narrator, lending her versatile and beguiling voice to such books as A Beautiful Mind and Bel Canto from our basement studio. When she saw that a flood was imminent, Kate struggled to retrieve her recording equipment from the basement before it could be damaged by water. But before she could get out of the studio, something fell in front of the door and trapped her inside.

I was at work, and she called me from her cell phone to tell me what was happening. Instinctively, I rushed home to get her out. When I arrived, the water was rising fast. Kate kept reassuring me as I fought with all my strength to pry open the door to the studio -- but before I could do so, the floodwater swelled above my head and engulfed the basement. To keep from drowning, I was forced to swim away. A wrenching 15 minutes ticked by as a rescue team arrived and recovered Kate, unconscious.

She was taken to the hospital, and there, I realized with horror, the seemingly unfathomable scenario Kate and I had discussed after watching The Sopranos was unfolding before my eyes. A social worker prevented me from entering the emergency room, telling me that Washington State did not recognize same-sex partners as next of kin. Kate and I had yet to procure all the legal documents to establish our medical authority for each other; therefore, as if I were a stranger, I had to get the permission of one of Kate's family members to be near her and to make decisions for her care. I frantically dialed Kate's sister in Virginia as precious time went by. I thought with a shudder, What if no one is home? What if Kate dies without me holding her hand? After being barred from comforting Kate during these harrowing moments, I finally received permission from Kate's sister to be with her. From that point on, I could be like any other spouse fighting for their loved one.

That night, Kate died with me beside her. I was able to remove the wedding ring that she wore and the necklace I gave her for her 40th birthday. I was able to tell her that I loved her. If I hadn't reached Kate's sister, I may have never had those irreplaceable moments.

After Kate passed, I still did not receive recognition as her spouse. Since I was not her legal wife, the funeral director would not even look at me and directed all of his questions to Kate's mother, who had to authorize the request for her cremation. The death certificate made no mention of our relationship. I could not imagine that our relationship would be treated with so little respect in Seattle -- the city that Kate and I had loved for its progressivism and humanity. Before the tragedy, I never realized in my relatively comfortable life that so much more had to be done to really achieve essential equality and dignity for same-sex families.

So, in January 2007, when the Washington State house and senate began considering a domestic- partnership law providing the hospital visitation and end-of-life rights that Kate and I lacked, I decided to share my story with lawmakers. I didn't write my speech because I knew that the legislators weren't going to understand what was at stake unless I spoke from my heart. In the end, they got the message and pushed the bill through by a narrow margin. The law went into effect on July 23, 2007.

That achievement is only the latest in a nationwide campaign for basic equality. Though a good number of cities and counties -- and some states -- officially recognize same-sex partners, 39 states do not. As a result, thousands of gay people across the country will continue to face the same uncertainty and indignity that Kate and I experienced when their loved one is an emergency situation. And, in spite of their most prudent preparation, same-sex partners still may not be recognized as family when tragedy strikes. Even if Kate and I had received all the legal documents before December 14, the flood would have destroyed them anyway. Does anyone really carry such paperwork around all the time?

To further honor Kate, I am continuing to press for essential dignities for same-sex families in emergency and end-of-life situations by coproducing a documentary about our story, titled For My Wife. Watching TV with Kate on that blissfully uneventful night weeks before she died, I never could have imagined that our lives would ever be the subject of a film. But as much as can be unexpectedly lost in one year, I've learned also that so much can be unexpectedly achieved. With that wisdom in mind, I'm making this film knowing that, in some way, Kate will be watching.

I Took the Synesthesia Challenge

60%

Rest in Peace Heath Ledger

I don't usually follow movie stars, but I was so impressed by Brokeback Mountain and Heath Ledgers excellent part in it that I was sad and shocked to hear that he passed away so suddenly and at such an early age. May he rest in peace.

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Your Personality Profile

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ERCP

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Endoscopic
Retrograde
Cholangio
Pancreatography

My fun plans for tomorrow. It's to grab that stubborn, last gall stone. They say it's a one day procedure, but the last one I had in November was 6 days in the hospital with pancreatitis. Let's hope that doesn't happen again.